slowly eating me up bit by bit..all the misery that it's causing. i wish that this weekend would never end, but i know i have to go back to work tmr. just thinking of it makes me so sick, i do everything to just not to think about it...working at cartel,training extra hard at judo...BUT it's not helping...talked to ppl, iknow they care, but they just dont understand the situation. if it was that simple i'd wont be like this...i really dont wanna disappoint anyone, that's why i stayed on for so long already...guess she just hates me..body language tells me so...there's no use just wasting 3 months there if i know i'm going want to be labeled as " quitter" .

i'm not myself anymore.. i cant smile, i just put on a smile coz i have to, not because i want to...it's been a month already, the intern from SP left last friday.. so now i'm more alone than ever.. i dont know what tmr would be like or how this week would be like... i really dont mind hard work,i just cant take all the feelings and the mental torture that i'm getting from her!

every morning i force myself to take the bus, it's like boarding the bus to hell, i feel so useless, cant even take a bus alone, with out the terrible feelings waiting to explode..I'm so useless... sigh..now i duno wad to do...to fail..may as well quit now...i'm staying on coz i dont

mrs. C call me the other day during work, talked to her in the toilet for a long time.. coz my mum called up the school...coz i was on the edge of an emotional break down... she just kept telling me that i'd have to get used to it, and there's nth i can do to get out of that hell hole.. and the only way to leave that place is to drop SIP, and as a result fail SIP, so i'll have to repeat a semester...and a transfer wasnt allowed... felt like my whole world came tumbling dwn...

no one understands..all they'll ever tell me is " u'll get used to it! and just stay on, 3 months will pass real fast..." easy for them to say.. it's me who have to go through all that shit evryday.. it's only been a week and i feel like shit inside although idont show it on the outside..many times i tell myself to be strong and endure...i can take physical work and hard work.. but emotional stress,feeling left out and fustrated coz i cant do nothing about it makes it all worst, plus the long bus ride to work is a real torture...

i guess u guys must be real tired hearing me whine all day... but cant help it.thanks for listening anyway... oh well i guess no one really understands wad i', going through right now... wad can i say.. my personality clash with the people working there...just cant click...emotional, langauge and culture barrier... i know i'll disappoint alot of people if i quit now..but sometimes i wish i was emotionally stronger..

no one understands wad the hell i'm going though.. i mean everyone tells me it's a matter of getting used to.. i mean i've tried my best..everyday is just a torture for me... going all the way to woodlands.. facing the people there.. getting more depressing by the day.. everyday it's a challenge to wake up.. no matter how early i sleep...freaking fustrated.. the LO keeps telling me it's like that.. and that i'll get used to it.. i dont wanna end up like this...

i dont think i can last for 3 months.. i dont wanna be sad for the 3 months.. i dont want to go home and cry everyday...i guess no one will ever understand wad i'm going through..all the encouragement they're giving is u'll get used to it...

slowly eating me up bit by bit..all the misery that it's causing. i wish that this weekend would never end, but i know i have to go back to work tmr. just thinking of it makes me so sick, i do everything to just not to think about it...working at cartel,training extra hard at judo...BUT it's not helping...talked to ppl, iknow they care, but they just dont understand the situation. if it was that simple i'd wont be like this...i really dont wanna disappoint anyone, that's why i stayed on for so long already...guess she just hates me..body language tells me so...there's no use just wasting 3 months there if i know i'm going want to be labeled as " quitter" .

i'm not myself anymore.. i cant smile, i just put on a smile coz i have to, not because i want to...it's been a month already, the intern from SP left last friday.. so now i'm more alone than ever.. i dont know what tmr would be like or how this week would be like... i really dont mind hard work,i just cant take all the feelings and the mental torture that i'm getting from her!

every morning i force myself to take the bus, it's like boarding the bus to hell, i feel so useless, cant even take a bus alone, with out the terrible feelings waiting to explode..I'm so useless... sigh..now i duno wad to do...to fail..may as well quit now...i'm staying on coz i dont

mrs. C call me the other day during work, talked to her in the toilet for a long time.. coz my mum called up the school...coz i was on the edge of an emotional break down... she just kept telling me that i'd have to get used to it, and there's nth i can do to get out of that hell hole.. and the only way to leave that place is to drop SIP, and as a result fail SIP, so i'll have to repeat a semester...and a transfer wasnt allowed... felt like my whole world came tumbling dwn...

no one understands..all they'll ever tell me is " u'll get used to it! and just stay on, 3 months will pass real fast..." easy for them to say.. it's me who have to go through all that shit evryday.. it's only been a week and i feel like shit inside although idont show it on the outside..many times i tell myself to be strong and endure...i can take physical work and hard work.. but emotional stress,feeling left out and fustrated coz i cant do nothing about it makes it all worst, plus the long bus ride to work is a real torture...

i guess u guys must be real tired hearing me whine all day... but cant help it.thanks for listening anyway... oh well i guess no one really understands wad i', going through right now... wad can i say.. my personality clash with the people working there...just cant click...emotional, langauge and culture barrier... i know i'll disappoint alot of people if i quit now..but sometimes i wish i was emotionally stronger..

no one understands wad the hell i'm going though.. i mean everyone tells me it's a matter of getting used to.. i mean i've tried my best..everyday is just a torture for me... going all the way to woodlands.. facing the people there.. getting more depressing by the day.. everyday it's a challenge to wake up.. no matter how early i sleep...freaking fustrated.. the LO keeps telling me it's like that.. and that i'll get used to it.. i dont wanna end up like this...

i dont think i can last for 3 months.. i dont wanna be sad for the 3 months.. i dont want to go home and cry everyday...i guess no one will ever understand wad i'm going through..all the encouragement they're giving is u'll get used to it...